internal apocalypse

as promised i did some writing,
im not extremely happy with it,
but its a start.....


do you remember when we laid underneath the lightning,
when that thunder that was shaking our pulse,
the perfect storm.
wrapped in protection and awe,
terrified of being the unlucky percent.
i wish i could dig inside your head and find the switches to your fear,
turn them off,
watch you go out of a blaze of heartache.
You know that image in your head,
and that strangers words you've held onto,
the face you make when what you see is all wrong,
but really its all thats ever been there?
i wish i could steal the photographs that never have existed,
paint them over these walls around us,
watch you fall to the floor in a destructive mess.
remember when you told me it would all end soon and
you'd be the one to rebuild it into your own playground of rubble and scavenging?
the way your eyes glossed over hoping you hadn't just wasted a perfectly good lie?
i wish i could destroy this world,
tear it all down,
let you run again like you did when you were a child,
before the hate crept in and jaded your innocence.
i wish i could ask you whether its your head or your heart in control of these pedals,
but to honest,
if I'm riding with you,
i doubt i want to know.
i wish i could ask why you cried when you made it through the lightning storm,
but i know you don't like to remember disappointments,
so ill just go on letting you pretend it isn't over yet and someday you'll be struck.
i wish i could ask what happens if the world doesn't collapse,
if it just keeps on spinning until you're old and grey and pass in your sleep,
but mostly i believe you when you say it will,
I'm pretty positive you'll make sure it does,
to be honest all i really want to know is if you'll bring me along and
let me watch as everything around us is as beautifully broken down as your heart.
someday i promise ill be more like you,
be that image painted across the white walls you hate,
be the floorboards catching your last tears,
be the grime under your nails thats shows your hands got dirty.
someday ill break that promise,
you never seem to mind anyways,
the worse i break you,
the more content the smile at the side of your lips seems
and while you're living to be a legend,
I'm living to see that smile.