stupid holiday season

okay yes i know thanksgiving isnt a huge deal,
but its about being with the people you care about,
and right now 99% of those people are 2000 miles away.
sad turkey day.
so im boycotting,
tonight will be filled with lots of booze
and chinese food and movies.
my mood has been too touch and go lately
and im already a bit too homesick,
not to mention i fly back to my lovely washington
in exactly 12 days, yes thats correct 12.
its so close and so far away and this stupid
holiday is making it worse.
dear everyone having a good turkey day,
enjoy it.
everyone else,
chinese food is always good.
-end rant-

random thoughts in ink...

a life different than the one in front of my eyes
and miles away from the pavement under my feet.
its all too far away and hitting all too close to the heart.
the chaotic scunge that keeps my veins on the verge
of collapsing is still fresh in my past but
i cant seem to pinpoint why i love it too much
to let it drift away from me.
you're my skeletons and my closet is open.
i dont want to change your life,
i dont need to be part of your routine,
you dont get to miss me.
look at me destroy your doubt.
im doing it,
without you,
without that place,
without hesitation or caution.
im sitting on the clouds inside my dreams,
you're simply clutching to the ladder
i had to climb to get here.
ive been striped of my amenities and comfort,
ive become a new breed,
my multiple faces have been chiseled to fit
in a new world you dont have the ability to picture.
what happened to my life?
i want to share this and keep it all to myself,
i want to dig down and expose my roots to my new life
and pave them over to never be mentioned again.
i want to know where i can find paradise.
can someone force me to remember where i love
myself regardless of the outside view?
im lost and found.
im without devastations breaking my heart
or dreams biting at my ankles.
im a routine you cant decode well enough to follow
and an image i cant see clearly.
this is a mess that cant be cleaned
and an organization you cant tamper with.
maybe im ok,
maybe im falling apart all over again
and wont notice till ive dropped too many
pieces to keep this life afloat.
im dying for a loss of gravity,
im living for a moment of time i cant measure.
im a collage of the steps ive taken
and a continual pile of the steps im walking now.
a fragment of your life you hate to remember
and i dont want to be.
im trying to figure out how to loose my impact
i have on your hearts,
and how to make something push mine into my throat.
i wish i knew how to live slower
or speed up the years to match mine.
maybe im content,
maybe im no where close.
maybe this is home...

for your viewing pleasure...

so ive been working on some art stuffs
figured id go ahead and post some pictures
like ive been promising for months sooo...

i made these for a friend of mine.
hes a little trainhopper and loves
exploring things and being a dirty hobo mess,
so these fit his personality.
they're only maybe 5x6 so not much
space to work with, but i thought they
were kinda cool.






these ones are all pages out of my journal,
so 9x12 or so. i apoligize about not really being
able to read what they say,
im still taking photos on my phone
cause of my lack of camera,
so hold tight and ill try my best to get some
things scanned at kinkos or something soon.
if youd like to know what they say feel free to ask.









these ones are slightly larger,
like 18X24 maybe,




ill try to continue to get more pictures up
as more art happens, but with this
obnoxious holiday season in motion
starbucks seems to be sucking up majority
of my art making time.
although i did find time yesterday to go
out and show my support and
even get a little sloshed.
=]]
pictures from the proposition 8 protest
in Chicago IL:







i hope all of you found time to go out
and show your support.
it was a good time and it even started snowing
a little while marching,
we took over multiple of the busiest roads
in downtown chicago,
turns out the gays get angry too
=]]
hope everyone had a good weekend
and is joining the i could use an
economy sized asprin for my economy sized
hangover club.
=]]

a little piece of politics for the win

this is important.

in almost every city in the country this saturday is
rallies to appeal the prop 8 in california,
please attend if your schedule allows,
ill be supporting in chicago.
you can find where things are going on in your
city HERE
thanks a ton everyone!

i dreamed we spoke in lyrics...

alright a little catch up in my
few spare hours i have off from work,
starbucks seems to be consuming my life.
hope everyones halloweens were fun,
unfortunately i was at work all night,
literally, 7pm-5am.
its chill i got to go in costume and
rip some drunkasses new assholes. =]]

hot zombie mess.
ive been trying to work on some stencils
and collaging to get some artual frustration out.
hopefully ill get up some pictures of
some projects soon here.
went down to grant park the other day for the obama speech.
still not a big fan of the guy but i pick him
over palin anyday, and in reality my choices
never had a chance to win so i guess ill take
your guys word for now.
anyway, it was kinda fun to be in the giant
crowd of people and hell it is history in the making
and who doesnt love a big rally.
i officially have like 33 days or something of
the sorts until i go back home.
sooo fucking excited.
ive decided i like this place too much to
leave it right now and still feel like i accomplished
what i came for, sooo im not moving back in december.
my tax return this year should kick ass since
ive adopted these new workaholic tendencies,
so that comes in like what february? march?
just enough time for me to go home for a week,
visit, see how i feel being back there and
still come back spend a good eight months here atleast
and still have the money shortly after
to move back if i decide to,
plus thatll give the mother and my sister
AhemMorganAhem to come visit here.
i want to show them my new city.
im almost worried about how clear and rational
my head is these days, its so out of character.
ive been trying to get this mix cd project
started, i gotta get a P.O. box
and build up a starting base.
maybe ill secretly out up a flyer on
our event board at the starbucks.
i talked to the mother today about getting
our tattoos when i come back.
super stoked,
its something along the lines of this...

but a litte different...
and yes, my mother has decided she needs
the same tattoo as me >_<
damn her hahah.
im working on trying to talk her into paying
for mine for my birthday present.
im craving new ink like crazy.
ive been working on some sweatshirts lately too,
trying to find some way to get some
creative juices out,
theyre seriously bottling up in there,
im thinking i need a good dose of
washington to get them out.
anyway, i guess thats about it for now.
<3